Nuptials of Absurdity
by Jet556
Summary: Take a wedding and add some hilarity before the ceremony than is enough to make it seem like it came out of the works of Shakespeare. This is that story. A mutual family friend is getting married and thus Randy, Howard and the like are dragged along leading to things such as yellow socks, some hijinks worthy of Benedick and Beatrice but sadly no one getting the head of a donkey.
1. A Wedding

**Welcome everyone. This will be more of a comedy than what I usually do and by "comedy" I mean the Elizabethan meaning. It involves a marriage between two unmarried characters at the end, a happy ending so naturally I felt having this set at a wedding would work best with the slapstick, puns, dry humor, witty banter and practical stuff happening before the ceremony. Enjoy and review.**

 **A Wedding**

Wedding, nuptials, union, espousal what ever it was called there was one going on in Norrisville. Max Michael Buono; the twenty-nine year old mutual family friend of families such as the Cunningham's, Weinerman's, Warburton's and what not, was getting married to Karolina Ina Dunham. Being a person who was known for ambitious events, Max intended for the wedding to be three hours and nineteen minutes long with the ceremony happening ninety-nine minutes in.

"Ninety-nine minutes in!" exclaimed Ken Finlayson, Heidi Weinerman's boyfriend and thus date, as he stood by a fountain in front of the massive cathedral where the wedding was to take place. "By Ogma, is this a wedding or a joint film between Goerge Stevens, David Lean and Jean Negulesco?"

"Was David a lean man?" asked Randy Cunningham, sitting not far away as he heard Ken speak.

"Certainly, for Lean was as lean a man as a guy whose whole left side was cut off is all right." Replied Ken.

"Wish I could say the same about that joke." Commented Randy in a casual voice while at the same time expressing a calm demeanor.

"Where is Niall?" asked Ken. "He enjoys a good pun, he and I enjoy Shakespeare's comedies a great deal. He has just yet to work himself up to the best productions. I prefer my 'Twelfth Night' with Victorian costuming and to be set in winter, near Christmas."

"And Niall?" asked Randy. "How does he enjoy his 'Twelfth Night?'"

"With random costuming, a setting that could be at anytime of the year and for it to be a musical." Replied Ken.

"That wouldn't happen to be a description of that production from Stratford, Ontario from a year or two ago you told me about would it?"

"It would."

"It wouldn't happen to feature Malvolio's yellow stockings would it?" asked Randy.

"I do not know of a production that omits that scene." Replied Ken. "Though, I've only seen three productions so who am I to say if that scene has ever been omitted?"

"And how many has Niall seen?"

"Two he has told me and they are both productions I have seen but he has yet to see the one I prefer."

"Then they include the yellow stockings?"

"Yes." Replied Ken. "Why a sudden interest in what productions we have or have not seen?"

"Because Ken, I saw Niall talking to Howard about that yellow stockings scene and for once Howard did not look bored at Niall's talk of Shakespeare." Stated Randy. "He looked inspired and while Niall told him about that scene, Howard's eyes were first on Heidi and then on Robert!"

"Robert?" asked Ken, his eyes widened.

"Niall's older brother." Stated Randy.

"I know who you mean!"

"Then why did you ask?"

"I was expecting you to nod!"

Randy nodded. "There, are you happy?"

"No! And do you know why? Because that chubby and jocund compeer of yours is up to some atrocious gag!"

"Why don't you talk normally?" asked Randy, having only understood "atrocious gag."

"Because there s no fun in that!" exclaimed Ken, taking a step to look for Howard only to step on a duck that had been sitting nearby causing the duck to fly away, quacking in pain at having been stepped on. Upon flying away, the duck caused Ken to fall backwards. Why? Well, Ken's foot came onto the back of the duck and the duck's dashing away caused Ken to lose his balance and quite nearly fall into the fountain.

And then duck came back, no longer quacking in pain but quite vengefully. However, it ended up attacking Randy instead only for it to stop when Randy declared: "Leave me alone! I have laid with chickens!"

Ken's reaction? "I don't want to know."

Randy's response? "It's not how it sounds!"


	2. A Letter

**Welcome back everyone. Hope you enjoyed the first chapter, now we move on to the second. Enjoy and review.**

 **A Letter**

In the cathedral's garden, Robert Warburton walked. Once a bastard of the highest caliber, for a high school student at least, Robert had since come to terms with no longer being the favorite of the Warburton household. When it was just Robert and Niall the former had been the favorite of their mother and the latter had been the favorite of their father. Then Sarah had been born and the favoritism was gone as quickly as a bad dream. Niall was quick to adapt to no more favoritism but Robert took a little bit longer. Robert had pretty much gone from big brother bully to sitcom arch-nemesis to Niall. They may not have had the best relationship was it was better than it had been initially. Robert didn't really do any harm any more he more or less just annoyed Niall and they would always insult each other in alphabetical order and prank each other.

Still Robert was infatuated with Heidi Weinerman despite her now being in a relationship with Ken Finlayson. The description "lovesick fool" never fit more. Thus when he found an envelope with his name on it he only hoped it was from Heidi, because really who'd be writing to him?

Not Heidi that was for sure! Robert didn't even recognize his own brother's handwriting but to be fair he couldn't tell one person's handwriting apart from another's. Niall had been the one to do the writing and Howard had supplied him with Heidi's diary so Niall wouldn't do any of his own flowery writing.

"By Samson, this is Heidi's handwriting!" exclaimed Robert. "'To my faceless boo…' Who does this mean? Ken has a face but it isn't much of a face. 'Jehovah savvies I carry a torch for only you. My lips won't speak but your name but I know you to be R, O, B, E.' Robe? No, that's not it… Wait a minute, each of these letters are in my name! All that is missing is the T! Heidi loves me! I knew it! 'Remember who applauded your yellow socks and wish to see you wear them again and please smile often." Robert clearly forgot the petition that Heidi had started to make Robert never wear his yellow socks into public they were that ugly! Likewise, he also forgot about the petition that Heidi had also started to make Robert stop smiling in public, it came across as more of a grimace. Both petitions had gotten enough signatures and thus Robert had never smiled nor wore his yellow socks in public ever again. "I will do these and I will do these today!"

Robert then walked away and from behind a statue Howard and Niall walked out. Howard was grinning most diabolically but Niall only had a troubled look on his face.

"Good thing Robert's an idiot." Commented Howard.

"I'm starting to have second thoughts about this." Said Niall. "Robert is my actual brother, Ken is like a brother to me and Heidi has always been nice to me."

"Who cares?" asked Howard. "This will be funny!"

"Funny for who?" asked Niall.

"Funny for me!"

"You really do have skewered priorities." Commented Niall.

"And I am proud of that." Replied Howard. Howard then looked down. "Oh, my shoes are untied. Niall, can you tie them for me?""

"Sure, I'm closer to them anyway." Niall was in fact only three inches shorter than Howard. Niall knelt down to tie Howard's shoes only to pause for a moment.

"What's the matter?" asked Howard. "Is there something on them?"

"Do them yourself!" exclaimed Niall, standing up.

"I can't!"

"Why not?"

"There is a reason I where zip ups!"

"Oh." Niall knelt back down. "Okay then." Just then a cat appeared in the garden, startling Howard and causing him to accidentally kick Niall in the stomach. Niall's eyes widened in pain and he fell over. "What happened?"

"I saw a cat!"

"A cat?"

"Yes, a cat!"

"A cat?"

"Yes, a cat!"

"A cat?"

"Yes, what aren't you understanding about this?" asked Howard.

"Nothing." Replied Niall. "I just didn't realize you were allergic to cats."

"I'm not." Stated Howard.

"Then why do you have a fear of cats?" asked Niall.

"I don't!"

"Then why did you get all startled?"

"I was surprised!"

"I've never known you to act this way when surprised." Commented Niall.

"You don't know me that well."

"Does Randy know you this well?"

"No, I don't kick him."

"Why not?"

"I need him to play keytair, buy me food and play games with." Stated Howard.


	3. Finding Heidi or Finding Robert

**Welcome back everyone. Enjoy and review.**

 **Finding Heidi or Finding Robert?**

Walking through the cathedral, Randy and Ken simply could not make up their mind over who they were supposed to be looking for: Heidi or Robert. If they found Heidi then they warned her about the coming Robert in yellow socks. If they found Robert they warned him about the letter telling him to wear yellow socks.

"Alright, we should just split up." Said Ken.

"Split up?" asked Randy. "Since when are we a same-sex couple?" Ken just stared at him. "Okay, not the time for jokes."

"It certainly isn't the time for jokes!" exclaimed Ken.

"Alright, who should go looking for who?" asked Randy.

"I'll go looking for Heidi and you will go looking for Robert." Replied Ken.

"Why do I have to be the one to look for the big jerk?"

"Oh, so you want to go looking for my girlfriend?"

"Good point." Commented Randy. "Let the boyfriend look for the girlfriend… Wait, I am in no way related to Robert!"

"By Ogma, Randy just go!" exclaimed Ken. "Go before you drive to insanity!"

"Have you ever driven there before?" Randy's joke only caused Ken to wrap his hands around Randy's neck and begin to shake him violently.

"Will you get serious? This is no time to make jokes!"

"Really? Because the more I think about it the more this seems like something from a comedy." Stated Randy.

"Even Shakespeare's comedies had drama in them now get moving!" Ken let go of Randy and began his search for Heidi. Thus did Randy begin his search for Robert.


	4. Confession

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 **Confession**

Niall walked up the priest, the one who would be doing the marriage. He had a troubled conscience and so he came to the priest to make that.

"I'd like to make a confession." Said Niall.

"Now?" asked the priest, surprised. "Niall, I'll be doing a marriage in…" He checked his watch. "Actually, we still have a lot of time. Lets go." The two went over to the confession booth. "Alright, Niall—"

"Don't I get to say the line first?" asked Niall.

The priest sighed. "Alright, say it."

"Bless me, father for I have sinned."

"Okay, Niall lets here it. What happened? Did you return a library book late again?"

"Actually I am partaking in a prank against my brother." Stated Niall.

The priest just stared. "What? That's it? You're behaving as siblings should."

"I'm not done." Said Niall.

"You replaced his head in a family picture with that of an ass?"

"No… Are you familiar with 'Twelfth Night?'" asked Niall.

"Oh, I love that play!" exclaimed the priest. "Especially that part with the yellow… Oh, I see. So who is the girl? Was it that Rachel girl you were looking at?"

Niall blushed a bit. "No, no, no, no, no!"

"I can see I touched a nerve there." Commented the priest. "Alright, who was it then?"

"Heidi Weinerman." Stated Niall.

"Oh, yes!" exclaimed the priest. "I heard she's dating that Ken Finlayson. She's Jewish and he's neo-pagan, reminds me of Esther and Xerxes… What is he exactly?"

"Celtic."

"Not exactly like Esther and Xerxes then but almost." The priest ran a hand through his thinning hair. "I can see your conundrum. You pulled a prank on your brother based on the yellow stockings scene from 'Twelfth Night' and thus you don't want to possibly ruin someone's relationship. Ken is your friend, isn't he?" Niall nodded. "And you've told me you view Heidi as a big sister."

"And that's not even the half of it! I'm an accomplice!"

"Howard?" Niall nodded. "Figures, I see so much of myself in him when I was his age."

"What do I do?" asked Niall.

"Confront Howard. If I remember how I was back then, I wasn't the kind of person who had a conscience."

"But he's bigger than me!" exclaimed Niall in shock.

"You're four foot nine, most of the world is bigger than you."

"Can't I just stop Robert?" asked Niall.

"Sure, be David." Replied the priest. "I always did prefer reading about Samson, Moses, you know the ones DeMille made movies about."

"Ben Kingsley was a better Moses than Charlton Heston and Theodore Roberts combined." Commented Niall. "And Frank Langella a better Pharaoh of the Exodus than Yul Brynner and Charles de Rochefort There is no one better than Kingsley and Langella."

"This confession is over." The priest left the booth, thus leaving Niall as well.

Niall then poked his head out of the booth and called: "It's true!" The priest didn't listen. He just kept walking. Thus was Niall now left with having to stop his brother.


	5. Socks of Yellow

**Welcome back everyone. It's yellow stocking time. Enjoy and review.**

 **Socks of Yellow**

Heidi was in the garden and her attire for the wedding consisted of a red dress and high heels, a gold necklace and gloves that went nearly all the way up to her shoulders and black hose on her legs. While Heidi might have thought Karolina looked on top of the world, to Ken he was with the most comely girls at the espousal. Thus did Robert enter the garden with a mirror in hand and holding a mirror in hand, looking at himself! His smile was so horrifying a thing to see, as a cat would be horrifying to a mouse. From the border of the garden, Howard watched. He wanted to see what happened.

At the sight of Robert, Heidi let out a gasp. The combination of his grimace of a smile and his ugly yellow socks was certainly something to gasp at, if not faint at.

"What are you doing, Robert?" she asked.

Robert merely let out a laugh or at least would it be called a laugh. It sounded more like the squawking of a crow. "I am here, sweet Heidi, just as you asked of me!"

"What are you talking about? You're making me wish I never got out of bed today!" Heidi backed away from Robert who merely sat on a bench.

"Never got out of bed?" asked Robert. "Oh, then I would have come to you anyway!" He took a pose that would have been alluring but it was utterly ruined by his smile and his socks.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Remember who praised my yellow socks?" Robert stood up with a leg extended.

Heidi merely looked at his face. It was bad enough to have them next to each other but with one of those yellow socks closer to her than the other it would have been enough to make her sick. They were that ugly.

"What?"

"As William Shakespeare once wrote: 'Some are born great, some achieve greatness and some have greatness thrust upon them!'" It was at that moment that Robert thrust the mirror towards a specific part below Heidi's waist.

"You're bananas!" Heidi exclaimed. "Niall! Mr. Warburton!" She went running and then Niall popped up from behind a hedge, standing on a step ladder of else he'd never be able to do this, and threw a rainbow colored sack over Robert's head.

Thus ended that scene of insanity. Ken, Randy and Niall had prevented the scene from happening. Heidi had come running into Ken's arms, Niall had arrived just as that scene of insanity ended but had prevented there from being a part two and Randy had been standing at the cathedral entrance that he had been closest too.

When the time came for Cerdic to berate his firstborn son, it was once more in the garden since having it be in the cathedral itself would be distracting for others. Also there was Niall; the "hero of the occasion" as Cerdic put it; Heidi; the "victim of the occasion", again Cerdic's words; and with Heidi was Ken and not far off were Randy, Theresa, Howard, Debbie and some others such as Rachel.

"How disgraceful!" exclaimed Cerdic. "I'd say 'I'll never be able to show my face in public again because of this' but I've been such a recluse for much of my time living in this town I haven't really had much of a reason to show my face in public!" He was getting better at leaving the house. "What came over you? Did you suddenly just think you'd break the town law that the petitions has created by dictating that you should never smile or wear your yellow socks in public and try to debauch the one responsible for them?"

"But she sent me a letter!" protested Robert.

"Let her see it then!" demanded Cerdic.

"But she wrote it! Why would I have to show her what she wrote herself?"

"Robert Horemheb Warburton, you are trying my patience now show her that letter!"

Robert took the letter out of his pocket and handed it to Heidi. Heidi looked at it and said: "This isn't my handwriting."

"Whose then?" asked Cerdic.

"Mine!" said Niall, raising a hand meekly.

"You?" asked Robert.

"Me." Replied Niall.

"You?" asked Heidi.

"Oui." Replied Niall.

"You?" asked Cerdic.

"Yes!" exclaimed everyone else in unison.

"Niall, why would you do this?" asked Cerdic. "Has your rivalry of practical jokes with Robert gone so far that you'd get a second party mixed up in them?"

"It's not like you think, dad! Howard roped me into it!"

"Lies!" exclaimed Howard. "Lies and slander!"

"Since when do you use the phrase 'lies and slander?'" asked Niall.

"Since when do you use the word 'slander' period?" asked Randy that was an even better question than Niall's.

"Alright, now what made you change your mind?" asked Cerdic.

"Because I have a conscience, I love Heidi like a big sister and Ken is the best friend I've got in the whole world, I didn't want this to break them apart."

"It couldn't." said Heidi. "It just made me want to stay away from Robert even more."

"Okay, lesson learned for you." Cerdic then turned to Robert. "Give me your socks!"

"Can I go home to get new ones?" asked Robert.

"No, that is your punishment." Stated Cerdic. "You will be wearing no socks at this wedding."


	6. Howard and Debbie

**Welcome back everyone. Enjoy and review.**

 **Howard and Debbie**

Only ten minutes had passed since Robert's punishment. Niall had learned his lesson, Robert had no socks, Ken and Heidi were now inside the cathedral while Howard and Debbie had a brief argument and now Randy and Theresa hatched up a plan. They remembered that short story Howard had wrote, they remembered how he had Debbie practically fawning over him so naturally they thought about this but they were would need a few helping hands.

"Hey, Ken!" Randy walked up to Heidi's deformed boyfriend who just rolled his eyes, hoping he'd not be involved in something. "Which Shakespeare play do Benedick and Beatrice come from?"

"Ask Niall." Said Ken.

"I have and I want to make sure he got that right. He said 'Much Ado About Nothing', is that right?"

"Yes, it is…" Ken scratched his neck. "We've both seen two film adaptations of it, the same ones the Kenneth Branagh and the Joss Whedon ones…"

"How are they?" asked Heidi.

"Pretty equal." Stated Ken. "That is an opinion we all share. It's like 'Henry V' with the Laurence Olivier and Kenneth Branagh films they are both equal. You can't say either is better."

"Okay, so Benedick and Beatrice do come from 'Much Ado About Nothing.'" Said Randy. "Do you want to do something like what was done with them?"

"With who exactly?" asked Ken.

"Well, Niall has learned his lesson but has Howard?"

"Oh, no!" exclaimed Ken. "Who is the poor girl?"

"Debbie."

"Oh, then by all means go ahead!" Ken turned away from Randy to speak with Heidi. He barely got a word to her.

"Would you like to help?"

"No. Go away." Thus did Randy persuade Ken to the best of his abilities.


	7. Howard

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 **Howard**

"I can't believe you actually persuaded me." Said Ken as he, Randy and Niall walked closer to where Howard was. He was in a hall filled with busts of long dead members of the clergy such as Michael Tuck. Howard was barely visible but he was there. "Okay, lets get this done with."

"Ken?" asked Randy.

"What?" asked Ken, forgetting to whisper.

"That is what Theresa told me. Theresa told me that Debbie told her that Debbie is crazy about Howard!" said Randy. Ken could only glare. He could have been told that this was how it would start.

Upon hearing this, Howard peeked out from behind a bust of Saint Patrick. Had he heard that right?

"Debbie Kang?" asked Niall.

"Do you know any other Debbie's?" asked Randy.

"Well, I have a cousin named Debbie on my dad's side." Replied Niall. Ken could only sigh quietly while Randy rolled his eyes. "But to my knowledge, Theresa and her have never met and thus she could not have met Howard so it must be Debbie Kang!"

"Debbie Kang crazy about me!" exclaimed Howard. He almost walked out from behind the bust of Saint Patrick but stopped and instead let out a cry that sounded like he was trying to imitate a peacock. Needless to say disfigured 11th grader, the purple haired 9th grader and the short 9th grader were not fooled.

"How did Theresa say Debbie put it?" asked Ken.

"Like… Like… Like…" Randy's eyes widened as he realized he hadn't thought that far in advance. Ken's eyes widened as well with his right eye bulging frightening Randy into something. "Like she does Mexican Death Bears!"

Ken brought his flipper of a right hand to his face. "Blast my decision of watching 'Equus' last night!" The meaning of this was lost on both Randy and Niall 'Equus' was a play written in 1973 and adapted into a film in 1977 about a seventeen year old boy who blinded six horses and the case became a catalyst for his psychiatrists own doubts. That is all that shall be said on that.

Howard didn't even hear what Ken had said. He only heard what Randy had said. A big smile formed across his even bigger face.

In order to prevent an awkward bit of silence, Randy spoke. "What did you say, Ken?"

"I said 'then I am an ass!'"

"En ce sens?" asked Niall. Ken could only stare at him as if he had two heads.

"And the same to you!" returned Ken after a minute of silence. He may have lived in a lot of places in his sixteen years but a French-speaking nation was not one of them. He may have lived in Canada but never the French speaking part and in any case he had been French exempt due to having trouble learning it.

"Anything else?" asked Randy.

"And Howard is a blessed boy." Replied Ken with cynicism, a rare thing for the fantast to do.

"Anything else?" asked Randy again.

"What do you want me to say?" asked Ken, whispering.

"Something that doesn't sound like it came from Caesar's funeral speech!" whispered Niall in return. Ken went silent.

"I go, I go; look how I go, swifter than arrow from the Tartar's bow." And with that Ken exited the hall with a completely blank expression on his face and with such a speed one could call a roadrunner a tortoise!

Randy only then looked at Niall. Niall's response? "I am speechless and have nothing to say."

"But you have said something!" exclaimed Randy.

"What?" asked Niall, utterly confused.

"You said 'I am speechless and have nothing to say.'"

"Well yes but…" Niall paused before giving a little chuckle. "Yes, I have haven't I?" Seeing Howard from the corner of his eye, Niall thought about getting back to the task at hand. "You have Heidi's brother's ardor, Randy. Let Ken have hers. Are you and him getting married?" This only caused Randy to borrow Ken's reaction to such a thing, turning his head a bit to the left with his right eyebrow raised. Niall then realized that in no way did he bring them back to the task at hand.

It was at that point that Debbie entered the hall. "Is Howard in here?" she asked. "Against my will, I was asked to look for him." There was a double meaning in that! Howard was sure of it.


	8. Debbie

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 **Debbie**

As Debbie walked from the hall of busts she walked past Theresa, Heidi and Rachel talking to one another. By the time she had heard what she had heard, she was well out if sight but well in earshot.

"He told you what?" asked Heidi in shock. "My brother likes who?"

"Debbie, Howard likes Debbie." Replied Theresa.

Upon hearing that, Debbie froze. What had Theresa just said?

"Debbie Kang?" asked Rachel.

"Yes, that Debbie." Replied Theresa.

Debbie's eyes widened. Howard liked her? She should have guessed from that story he had written but had been too disgusted to think about it.

"My little brother and Debbie Kang?" asked Heidi. "Actually, not that bad of an item when you think about it."

Her and Howard an item? It wasn't impossible. There was something of a spark between them that one time. Maybe it was something that could happen.

With a smile on her face, Debbie went walking away. This time she would look for Howard and she would find him. Yes, she would find him and there was no doubt about that. They would be as happy as… Menelaus and Helen pre and post-Trojan war, before Paris kidnapped the latter and after she had been rescued from Egypt.


	9. The Climax

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 **The Climax**

When Howard and Debbie both found each other, they spoke to each other in unison. What did they say? Take a wild guess. They said: "I hear you like me?" If you guessed: "You're like a bald baboon!" you guessed wrong. "Yes, I do!"

"I heard you told Theresa that and then she told Randy!" said Howard.

"What! I did not!" exclaimed Debbie.

"Well who did you hear that I like you from?"

"From Theresa from Randy from you!" replied Debbie.

"I never said anything like that to Cunningham!"

It was at that point that Niall came walking through the hallway, humming a happy hum. When he saw Howard and Debbie standing in the middle of the hall and their heads turning in their direction, he turned around and started to walk in the direction from which he came.

"Niall!" yelled Debbie. Niall started to walk faster only to be tackled to the ground by the cannonball that was the combined force of Howard and Debbie slamming into him.

"N-No v-violence p-please." Stuttered Niall. "W-We a-are i-in—"

"Shut it, Warburton!" Howard was referring to him by his last name. This could not have been good. "This scheme! Whose idea was it! Was it yours?"

"I-I have nothing to say."

"I have ways of making you talk!" said Debbie.

"What's that?" asked Niall. "Claiming I'm the Ninja while the Ninja is standing not too far away?"

"What are you talking about? I have never done anything like that?"

"You have! I do not lie!"

And it was at that point that the wedding itself was beginning. Thus was Niall able to get away safely and for Howard and Debbie to realize who really was responsible for those fake love confessions.


	10. The Wedding Party

**Welcome back everyone. Here ends the story. Enjoy and review.**

 **The Wedding Party**

After the ceremony came the wedding party. It would be untrue to say that Howard and Debbie had forgotten about Randy and Theresa's little scheme during the ceremony. In fact they were arguing with Randy and Theresa in the cathedral hall while people celebrated in the garden where tables were set up and musicians were playing.

"How?" asked Howard. "How could you do this to me? Was Morgan unavailable?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Debbie. "Am I not good enough for you?"

And thus did Howard and Debbie turn on each other giving Randy and Theresa a chance to escape. Where did they escape to? Why to the party of course!

At the party, Niall was staring at Rachel trying to get up the courage to ask her to dance with him. If only he knew that it was supposed to be the girl who asked the boy and not the other way around. He thought it could be done vice versa.

"Want to dance?" asked Theresa.

"Without Howard here to get in the way, of course I do!" replied Randy and so he and Theresa danced. That was a dance that was a long time coming.

Sitting at a table, Ken and Heidi talked. Heidi wanted to dance but Ken just wanted to take it easy. Thankfully, they were not trying to persuade each other, which would be better.

"Do you want to be wed one day?" asked Ken.

"Would I be in a relationship if I didn't?" asked Heidi.

"No, I suppose you wouldn't…" said Ken. "Of course, I'm with the most comely damsel I have ever seen and I would like to espouse her some day."

Heidi blushed. "Most comely?"

"Most beautiful." Stated Ken.

"I know what you mean." Heidi kissed his cheek. "Quite the compliment and not so cliché when you say it. Maybe you can make more compliments like that when we go to Paris on that field trip to see the sights."

"Paris, Ontario?" asked Ken.

"No. Paris, France." Stated Heidi. If only Ken knew a bit of French that could get him by.

 **The End**


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